My Mistake
by The Little Monster 1024
Summary: After Beckett was shot, she sent Castle away saying that she needed time. Now, three months later, she shows up at Castle's book signing. But he's not as understanding. How will Beckett react when HE needs time?
1. Chapter 1

My Mistake

Chapter One

AN: Okay, another new story. I promise I'll work on both. (: Memories are in _italics._

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><p>Detective Kate Beckett sat at her desk in the 12th precinct, rhythmically tapping a pen on her desk. The current case had her stumped. A man found shot dead in his girlfriend's bed. The victim and the girlfriend had gotten in a violent argument not twelve hours before the murder. It had to be her right? Wrong. She had a perfect alibi. She, Ryan, and Esposito were all incapable of figuring out the killer. The case was over three days old, one of their longest in a long time.<p>

Though she wouldn't say it out loud, they needed him. His ideas could be outrageous, but proved to be incredibly helpful.

But he was gone, and it was her fault.

…

_"Kate it's been three months!" Rick said, after seeing the detective at his book signing for the first time in three months When he heard her voice, he felt a tug at his heart. He was thrilled to see her on her feet, but couldn't get over the hurt and anger she had caused him. Next to Alexis, and as much as he didn't want to admit it, his mother, she was the most important person in his life._

_"I told you I needed time." She said quietly, secretly in her head knowing that that wasn't enough She knew she should've called. She didn't know why she made him leave, but before the door even closed behind him, she wanted to call his name. _

_"You don't understand." He began. "I watched you die in my arms." He said. Kate felt her heart crack; just as his voice had._

_"I'm sorry..." She whispered, looking down at her hands; she couldn't meet his heartbroken blue eyes._

_"I need time too, Kate." Rick interrupted. _

_"W-what?" She stuttered, looking up at the author._

_"I'm going to the Hamptons for a little while." He said. This time it was him who was looking down. He knew if he saw one hint of sadness on her face, he would change his min, and he knew if he wanted to maintain his own sanity, he had to._

_Kate felt tears burning her eyes. He was leaving? He couldn't. The precinct needed him; she needed him. She had to tell him to stay, but how? Thing's were so complicated. "But what about everyone at the 12th?" She blurted out, hoping it would stop him._

_"They'll be fine." He said. "And like you've said before, I'm not a real cop." He said coldly._

_Why was he acting like this? Why was he being so cold with her? Even as she asked herself these questions in her head, she knew why. She didn't call. He told her he loved her, and she pretended not to hear. He visited her in the hospital, only to have her shoo him away. It was her fault. She had to let him go._

_"Okay," She said in a shaky voice. "Have a safe trip."_

_Her pitiful child-like voice tugged at his heart. He wanted to quickly apologize and promise to stay, but he couldn't. He needed time away; away from her. Away from the pain He looked down at her to see her giving him a fake smile. He could see tears in the corner of her eyes threatening to fall. _

_She smiled up at him. She couldn't let him know her sadness. If he needed time away, she would let him, no matter how much it hurt her. She found herself with her arms wrapped around him, squeezing him tightly. _

_He didn't expect the hug he received. He felt her small, strong arms around him. He wrapped his around her, only to have her pull away too soon. She then gave him a small smile before turning and leaving. Rick watched after her. He was making the right decision, right? _

_She didn't want to pull away from the hug. She wanted to hold on tight and not let her leave, just as she had done years ago when her father would leave for work. But she let go. She pulled away and turned to leave, not glancing back, in fear that the little girl would take over and hold onto him for dear life_

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><p>As she came back from her flashback, she found herself staring at "his" chair. She could still picture him there watching her do paperwork. Creepy or not; she wanted more than anything to have him there. The last two months had been almost unbearable, for more reasons than just Castle.<p>

She didn't notice Ryan and Esposito watching her with sympathetic looks.

It was no secret that Esposito wanted his friends together. They just kept complicated things. And things at the precinct had never been more complicated. They had a new police chief and they were missing a part of their family; and when one of them was gone, a piece of them all was gone.

Ryan watched Beckett. He found himself watching her a lot lately. He was worried about her. She was like an older sister to him and he couldn't watch her like this. When she was shot, he was sure she died and when he heard that she lived he was so happy. She had always been inspiring to him, her dedication and talent for finding the truth way amazing, but as he got to know her, a lot of that admiration formed into friendship and sympathy. She had serious emotional and personal troubles. He knew that her mother's death had been the cause. When Richard Castle walked into the precint, something began to change in his friend. He saw that sadness fade little by little, he saw a happiness in her that he had never seen before. But now, the sadness was back. He could see the pain in her eyes and it hurt him to know that it was her own fault.

"Detective Beckett, Ryan, Esposito?" Gates said, walking from her office, pulling the three detectives from their thoughts.

"Yes?" Beckett said, looking up from the chair.

"How are you coming along with this case?" Gates asked.

"We're working on it, Sir." Beckett said.

"It's been three days! What's the problem?" Gates said, annoyed at the time taken.

"We have no leads!" Beckett said.

"I don't appreciate the tone, detective." She paused. "I've heard great things about you." She said. "Don't make fools of those people."

Beckett sighed with a nod. "Yes sir."

Gates turned to leave as Beckett reached for her coat and purse.

"Going to visit your dad?" Esposito asked. Already knowing the answer. Jim Beckett had suffered a severe heart attack a month prior and Kate visited him everyday at two o'clock during visiting hours. Though he survived the operation, he was still in critical condition.

Beckett nodded. "Yep, I'll be back in about an hour." She said, turning to leave.

She walked to the elevator and waited impatiently as she waited. She was always nervous before visiting him. She was so worried about him; he was all she had left and she couldn't loose him.

She stepped into the elevator and tried to empty her negative and worrisome thoughts of her father. Her thoughts shifted back and forth between him and Castle, before setting back on her father.

"Stop worrying. He'll be fine. He always is." She whispered to herself before the doors opened with a ding.

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><p>What do you think? If you like this, check out my other story The One and Only. (:<p>

Oh and REVIEW REVIEW REVIEW! :D


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter Two

**AN: Thanks for all of the story subscriptions! I'd love to see a review in there too!**

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><p>Kate took a deep breath as she stood outside of her father's hospital room. She did this everyday. Going in there was scarier than going after any murderer. She could kick a door down and save the day, but she couldn't walk in an old hospital room.<p>

She placed her hand on the cold door knob and pushed it open to reveal her father lying in bed with a book in hand.

He looked up and smiled at her. She smiled back the best she could as she fought off the tears. It killed her to see the strongest man she ever knew, wasting away in a hospital bed. He got worse each day. He slowly lost weight and color. He looked so fragile to her and it felt so wrong.

She felt so guilty that she didn't visit more often. She hated the thought of him being alone all day. He was always there for her. When her mother died, he held her in his arms as she cried, not caring that she was a nineteen year old woman. When she was shot, he took care of her. He talked her through the shooting, slowly preparing her for her return to the precint.

"Katie." He said in a hoarse voice; the voice that Kate had come to get used to.

"Hi, dad." She said, walking over and hugging him carefully, afraid that too tight would hurt him.

She sat down in what came to be known as 'her' chair. She watched in sadness as her father lifted his book with great difficulty and sat in on the table near his bed. He was almost too weak to lift a one hundred page paperback book.

"How are you?" Jim asked her, barely sitting up.

She smiled. He always asked how she was, when he was the one that only really mattered. He knew that she was upset about Castle leaving.

Jim watched his daughter as she watched him. He saw the sadness in her eyes. He could read her like an open book. Ever since she was a baby, he could tell when she was on the verge of tears. He could see everything she had been through.

Johanna's death had changed the innocent girl who was his daughter. She matured overnight and then joined the police academy much to his dismay. She cried so much at first, but then she buried it deep down. She 'toughened' up and stopped crying. But Jim knew she still cried. He knew that on the anniversary of her death she sat in her apartment and cried, suddenly having too much pride to cry in front of her dad…

Until the shooting. He had never been so scared in his life. He felt as if he had been the one who was shot as he watched his baby girl fall to the ground in Castle's arms. He wanted to run to her; to hold her in his arms. But they pushed him to the ground. Various cops held him to the ground in fear the shooter would fire again. He looked up and watched as Castle held her and whispered to her. He watched the pain in his eyes as he looked down at her. His eyes then focused back on her, only to see her eyes closing as tears fell down her face.

He thought she was dead. He could've sworn that he had lost her. And when Castle and Josh began to fight, he almost lost it. He didn't know what to feel. The concern each had for Kate was great, but the petty fight was unnecessary. Josh didn't have the right to talk to Castle like that. He had no doubt that Josh loved Kate, but he knew it wasn't enough for him or Kate.

He sat in the waiting room for hours. He sat in silence with Castle. Castle made his mother and daughter leave, leaving him and Castle. Jim sat there and cried; he cried more than he had in nineteen years. The room was quiet except for his and Castle's muffled cries.

After her surgery and she was released from the hospital, she wanted to go to her apartment. She wanted to stay alone. He refused to let her. She came home and slept in her childhood bedroom for three months. He remembered the first night she was back. She could barely walk. He offered to carry her, but she being Kate, wouldn't hear anything of it. He helped her up the stairs and put her in the bed. He remembered how his heart broke during their conversation.

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><p>"<em>Do you want anything?" Jim asked as he helped Kate get her blanket situated.<em>

_Kate looked around her childhood bedroom to see it mostly the same. It was still painted the light purple that she chose when she was eleven years old. Her stuffed animals were still on a white shelf. It looked like the room of a toddler, and honestly it was. She was a last teenager, which she only admitted to herself, and never bothered to fix it. "No." She said to her father._

_Jim watched her as her eyes scanned the room with a smile. The first smile he had seen in a few days. Ever since she talked to Castle, she seemed upset; more upset than usual. "Katie?" He began. "Are you okay?" He said, sitting down on the edge of her bed._

_She looked at him and nodded. "Yeah." She said, not even believing herself. She couldn't stop thinking about what she did to Castle. Why did she make him leave? She knew why, but yet she didn't sometimes she could really hate herself._

_Jim looked into her eyes and could see her lie. "No, you're not." He said gently. "What happened between you and Castle?"_

_She stared at him for a minutes, she was angry at him for mentioning Castle, but at the same time she felt like bursting into tears, which she hated. She didn't know why but her surgery and the shooting had made her so emotional and she didn't know why. It drove her crazy. "Nothing…" She said, looking down at her hands._

"_Nothing?" He said. "They why didn't he only visit once? Something happened or else he would've been there everyday." _

_Her dad was right and she knew it. "I told him that I needed time." She paused. "And that I'd call him when I'm ready." She said._

"_Why? "He asked._

_Kate looked around as tears began to fill her eyes. She tried to blink them away and cursed herself when they fell. She hated crying, especially in front of people. "I don't know." She said her voice breaking. "I-I just need time." She whispered._

_Jim stood and walked down near her head and wrapped his arms loosely around her, not wanting to her hurt fresh stitches. _

_She turned and looked at the wall not wanting her dad to see her tears. She put her arm on his and tried to wipe her tears with the other._

"_Kate, look at me." Jim said._

_Kate turned and looked at her father, trying her best to wipe away the tears. Jim moved her hands away and wiped her tears for her. "It's okay." He said as he felt one of his own tears fall. "You're okay."_

_She turned and pulled him as close as she could without hurting herself and laid her head on his shoulder. "I don't know what's wrong with me." She said. "I can't let mom's case go and it keeps hurting the people I care about." _

_Jim let his tears fall as he rubbed her back. "You have to." He said. "I thought I lost you." He said as his voice broke. "I can't take that chance." _

_It was silent except for the silent cries. "Katie, if I could've gotten up there soon enough." He paused. "I wanted to get to you and hold you, but I couldn't." He said. "When Castle got up there I felt a little better knowing that you weren't alone up there." He said._

_Kate took a deep breath. "Dad…" She paused. "He told me he loves me." She said. "But I told him I didn't hear it." She said, turning to look in his eyes._

"_Do you feel the same?" Jim asked, knowing the answer. _

_Kate slowly nodded. "Yeah, I think so." _

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><p>That night, Jim had fallen asleep next to her, like he used to when she was a little girl.<p>

"I'm fine dad." She smiled. "I always am." She paused. "How are you?"

Jim smiled at her. "I'm good. Just tired of this place."

Kate laughed. "I'm tired of this place too."

"Kate, why don't you run off and do something else. You don't have to sit here with me." Jim suggested.

"No," She said. "I like talking to you dad."

Jim smiled up at his daughter. "Has Castle called yet?" He asked.

He noticed as her smile faded and she looked to the ground. "No; I don't think he will dad."

Jim didn't believe her. He knew that he would call. He reminded him of himself. It took him three years to realize he loved Johanna and now that he knows that Rick loved Kate, there was nothing that would keep Castle away forever. "Katie, he's going to call…"

"Dad, please." She said, looking up. "I don't want to talk about Castle."

Jim nodded. "How's the case coming?"

Kate sighed in frustration. "We've got no leads whatsoever, and Gates isn't happy about it." She paused. "This case has taken us longer than like any other case in the last three years. It's so frustrating." She said.

Jim smiled. The dedication she had for her job never ceased to amaze him. "How are Esposito and Ryan holding up?" He asked.

Kate smiled. "They're frustrated too." She said. "But they still manage to have fun."

"Are you having fun?" He asked.

Kate smiled. "Yes dad."

He laughed. "Now why don't I believe you?"

Kate smiled as she sat back in the chair, relaxing into the conversation.

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><p>Esposito and Ryan smiled as their boss walked into the 12th.<p>

"Yo, Beckks!" Esposito said. "How's your dad?"

Kate smiled at them as she sat her purse down at her desk. "Same." She said.

"Is he getting better?" Ryan asked.

"Yeah, I think so." She said, turning and picking up a folder from her desk. "Any new leads?"

Esposito shook his head. "Nope, and if we don't figure this out soon I think Gates is going to bump us all down to traffic." He said.

They all glanced into her office to see her looking back at them. They quickly looked away.

"She's been doing that since you left." Ryan said. "It's creeping me out."

Kate couldn't help the laugh as she watched the nervous expression on Ryan's face.

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><p><strong>Okay, so what do you think? I got a lot of story subscriptions, which I LOVE, but can I have a review or two? Please? I don't want to have to beg. (:<strong>


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter Three

**AN**: **Sorry for the long wait! Hope you like it!**

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><p>Finally, after a week, Beckett, Esposito, and Ryan solved the case. The killer turned out to be the man's sister who lived in Florida. Their parents had recently died and he was left everything in the will. In a jealous rage, she shot her brother at his girlfriend's house.<p>

Beckett and the boys were angry that they hadn't figured it out sooner. It seemed so simple.

As angry and disappointed in themselves as they were, Gates was ten times angrier. After the sister was arrested, Beckett, Ryan, and Esposito stood with their heads staring at the ground as they listened to their captain. She said she was disappointed in them and that they weren't living up to everything they were said to be.

About three hours later, the three detectives and a certain ME found themselves sitting in Beckett's apartment, beers in hand, playing poker.

Ryan sat his beer down on Beckett's old card table and stood up. "I think I'm calling it a night." He said, pushing his chair in.

The rest of the group looked up at him with confused expressions on their faces.

"Why?" Esposito asked. "It's only 7:30." He said, looking down at his watch.

"He's probably just mad because I'm kicking his ass." Beckett said with a laugh.

Lanie shook her head. "No, everyone is mad that you're kicking our asses."

Ryan laughed. "Jenny asked me to be home at eight." He said, grabbing his jacket.

Everyone else stood along with Ryan, gathering cards and chips and exchanging money owed.

"Beckett, one day I'm going to beat you at poker and win all of my money back." Esposito said, passing a twenty dollar bill to Beckett.

She laughed as she stuffed it into her pocket. "Sure you will Javi."

The group erupted in laughter, half because of Beckett and half because they were all a bit tipsy.

They said their goodbyes to Ryan after he assured them he would be taking a cab and not driving, and the remaining of the group settled on Kate's couch. Kate laid across the loveseat sideways while Lanie and Esposito sat together on the sofa.

They were all quiet until Lanie spoke up to Kate. "So, have you talked to Castle lately?"

Esposito flashed her a 'What the hell are you doing?' look. Lanie saw it, but ignored as she stared at her best friend sitting not ten feet from her.

Kate shook her head, acting as if it didn't bother her that they hadn't talked in months. "No, and I don't think that he's going to call anytime soon." She said.

"Maybe you should call him." Lanie suggested.

"No," Kate said, shaking her head. "He said he needed time. He didn't call me when I said I needed time."

Lanie sighed. She loved Kate like a sister but she didn't understand what she was doing. Castle loved her so much and all she seemed to ever do to him was hurt him. He had feelings too and she acted as if she didn't. Lanie wasn't sure if she actually understood why it was wrong that she didn't call after the shooting. Castle was hurt and she needed to call him.

"Honey, he's really hurting right now. I really think you should call him and apologize." Lanie said.

Esposito noticed the angry expression growing the detective's face. He recognized the look and knew for a fact that it should be avoided at all costs. He elbowed Lanie gently. "Stop." He whispered. He looked up at Kate. "Beckett…"

"Apologize?" Kate said loudly, ignoring Esposito. "Why the hell do I need to apologize?"

Lanie stared at the death glare she was receiving and grinned. "Damn, I forgot that you're an angry drunk." She paused. "Kate, you can't sit there and defend the fact that you didn't call him after he tried to save your life."

"I needed time, I've already said that." Kate said. She knew that her actions were wrong, but she didn't want to admit it out loud. She also wasn't calling Castle to apologize, while it was wrong for her to leave and not call, it was also wrong of him.

Lanie tried to read the expression on her friends face. "I know that you know that that isn't a good enough excuse." She said gently.

Kate knew she was right. She looked down at her father's watch and spun it around her wrist. "I know." She whispered. "I should've called him…"

"Honey," Lanie interrupted.

"But he should call me." She paused. "Two wrongs don't make a right."

Lanie and Esposito exchanged a look, neither knowing what to say. Kate had been wrong. That was out, everyone knew it, but it was just as wrong when Castle didn't call her.

Lanie was about to say something when her words were silenced by the ringing of Kate's cell phone.

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><p><strong>Questions? Comments? Critiques? Reactions? Random crap? My review box accepts all of them. And anything else you want to put in there. :)<br>****Oh, and sorry for the shortness of this chapter! I wanted a cliffy!**


	4. Chapter 4

**AN: Thanks for the reviews! You guys are awesome! Sorry for the cliffy! **

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><p>The ringing of the phone caused silence to spread across the room. They all stared at Beckett's phone that was ringing from the coffee table. Who was it? Was it Castle? It couldn't be…but maybe…<p>

Lanie and Esposito exchanged looks, each had a hopeful look in their eyes. It was almost too good to be true. Lanie looked over at Kate who was staring at her phone as if it were an alien. She acted as if she had never seen it before and didn't have the slightest clue how to approach it. "Are you going to get that?" Lanie asked.

Kate quickly nodded, snapping out of her trance. She all but pounced on top of her phone in fear that she'd miss the call. She ignored caller ID for the same reason and quickly hit the answer button.

"Castle?" She answered subconsciously. She didn't know why, but it just slipped out. She mentally kicked herself for it. _Desperate much?_

Lanie and Esposito smiled as they watched their friend.

"Oh, Hi." Kate said, quickly getting up and leaving the room quickly.

Lanie and Esposito exchanged yet another knowing look.

"See?" Lanie said. "I told you he'd call her."

Esposito nodded. "I'm glad. The way she mopes around the precinct is really depressing. Ryan and I tried to cheer her up but nothing really helped."

Lanie smiled. She couldn't help finding the sibling bond between her three favorite detectives adorable. She was about to say something before Kate came running into the room, stopping at the front door to pull on her high heeled boots she had discarded earlier that evening.

"What's going on?" Esposito asked as he and Lanie stood from their spot on the couch. "What did Castle say?"

"It wasn't Castle," She said quickly, pulling her black trench coat around her tightly before grabbing her car keys. "I have to go."

By this time Esposito and Lanie had made it over to the door. Esposito reached out and grabbed Kate's arm tightly, gently pulling her from the hallway where she was already standing.

"Kate, what's going on? Where are you going?" Lanie asked frantically.

"That was the hospital." She said, quickly. "My Dad had another heart attack. They couldn't tell me much over the phone but it's not good. I have to get down there!" She said, pulling away from Esposito's grasp and fleeing the apartment. She was almost to the stairs when Lanie and Esposito chased after her, shutting her door behind them.

"Kate, you're drunk." Lanie said. "You can't drive."

"I'll be fine!" Kate yelled back.

She then lost them, running faster than them both. She ran from the building and quickly hopped into her Crown Vic. She slammed on the gas and began to drive as quickly as possible to the hospital. She cursed out loud when she got stuck behind traffic. She quickly swerved through tight spaces, receiving insults from fellow NYC drivers.

In record time, she arrived at the hospital. She ran inside, ignoring weird looks from others. She approached the desk quickly. "Hi, I'm Kate Beckett. My Dad is Jim Beckett. His Doctor just called me; Doctor Rosner."

Before the nurse could even answer her question, Doctor Rosner walked into the waiting room and called her over. Kate quickly approached him. Her heart began to race faster at the sad look on his face.

"How is he?" She asked quickly. "Can I see him?"

"Detective Beckett, why don't you step back here so we can talk?" He said gesturing out of the waiting room.

Kate quickly shook her head. "No, just tell me."

The doctor nodded with a sigh. "Your father has suffered another heart attack. He can't come back from it." He said sadly. "I'm afraid he won't make it through the night."

Kate stood still. She felt as if she had just been shot again. Her Dad was dying? The man who had helped her through her shooting? The man who had always been there for her. He couldn't die. She needed him. He couldn't leave her. She couldn't lose him like she lost her Mom. "No, h-he can't be dying. He's still young…he's always been healthy."

"I'm sorry Detective Beckett." He paused. "You can go see him if you want. We're not sure how much longer he has."

Kate wanted to go see him but she had no feeling in her legs. He COULDN'T be dying! She refused to believe it. She needed him.

"Detective Beckett?" The doctor said. Kate snapped out of her thoughts and walked quickly back to him room. She held her breath as she pushed the door open.

She froze at the sight of him. What little life he had left from earlier that day had been sucked out. His eyes were tired and lifeless. His breathing was slow and deep. Her breath caught in her throat at the sight. She couldn't move. She couldn't speak. She couldn't breathe.

"Katie." He said in a weak voice, quieter than a whisper.

Kate took a deep breath and walked over to her Dad's bed. She grabbed his hand and squeezed it tightly. "Dad." She said, her voice cracking with the simple word.

Jim looked up at the tears forming in his daughter's eyes. He didn't want to die, but it was his time; he knew it. Katie could handle herself. She was strong. "I'm dying." He said gently.

She swallowed hard and nodded, a tear trickling from her eye. She quickly wiped it away. "I know, Dad." She paused. "What am I going to do without you?" She choked out before a few more tears escaped.

Jim opened his mouth to speak but stopped himself. He patted the bed next to him, telling her to sit down next to him; he'd lost so much weight, and she was so small, there was easily enough room. He watched as she slowly sat down. After she was sitting, she slowly lowered down and nestled in-between him and the bar on the bed. "You're going to be just fine Katie. If you remember, you saved me. You don't need me here." He said, stroking her hair gently.

"You're all I have left." She said quietly.

Jim shook his head. "You have so many people who love you. Esposito, Ryan, Lanie, Castle and his family."

"Dad please." She said. She didn't want her last conversation with her father to be an argument over Castle.

"No, listen to me Katie." He said, making his weak voice as stern as possible. "You're going to call him. It's my dying wish; you can't deny me that. That man loves you and I know you feel the same way. If I've learned anything in this life it's that you never know how much time you have left. You should know that just as much as anyone."

Kate slowly nodded. "Okay."

Jim sighed. "You know I love you right?"

She nodded and wiped at tears that were still freely streaming. "I love you too Dad." She paused.. "And I'm sorry."

"Sorry for what?"

"For not being the daughter you deserve…"

"Katie…"

"No, Dad, just listen." She paused for a second before continuing. "You and Mom were always so great with me, but I insisted on rebelling and scaring you both when I didn't return home on some nights." She paused. "And after Mom died I turned into someone that wasn't me. I distanced myself from you…from the world. I hate myself for wasting all of that time; for not being with you when you were hurting just as much as me."

Jim sat there and took in the words his daughter had just said. She never ceased to amaze him. She was so much like her mother in the way that she only saw her own faults and no one else's. It was always her fault in her mind. "You're an amazing daughter and an even better person." He said. "Just remember that."

"I never solved Mom's case." She said quietly. "I never solved it in time for you."

"Katie, I don't need to know who killed Johanna. That man will get his one day, and it will be more that what the police will do. I'd rather have you alive and healthy than know your Mom's killer. She wouldn't want you to waste your life on this."

Kate sat there thinking about her father's words. He really didn't want to know.

They fell into a comfortable silence with only the heart monitor making noise. Kate's head rested on her father's shoulder as he wrapped an arm around her, holding her close. She listened closely to his struggling breathing; her heart ached at the sound. He stroked her hair gently as he did when she was a child, silently trying to calm the tears that were flowing. She stopped trying to stop them, unable to keep up. He didn't want her to cry over him. He didn't want her to crawl back in her little hole that she hid in when she was nineteen.

"Dad?" Kate said gently.

"Hm?"

"Tell Mom that I love her."

Jim simply nodded before a loud beep came from the heart monitor as Jim breathed his last breath. Kate wrapped an arm around him, holding on tightly as she cried. She cried into the hospital gown leaving dark stains from her mascara.

When nurses came running into the room she stood silently. She looked at the face of her father for the last time. She leaned down and kissed his cheek. "I love you, Dad." She whispered before leaving the room in silence. She wiped her tears away, knowing that her makeup was still running and her eyes were still red and puffy.

She walked out into the waiting room to see Lanie pacing the floor while Esposito, Ryan, and Jenny sat silently on the couch. The clicking on her heels on the hard flooring caused all eyes to focus on her. She received a few 'aws' and 'that poor thing' from strangers, but she ignored them. When she locked eyes with Lanie, she lost all control again. She didn't care if she was a Homicide Detective. She didn't care that she wasn't supposed to cry. She lost all self control and sobbed as Lanie pulled her into a tight hug.

"He's gone." She whispered to her friend.

"I'm so sorry honey." Lanie said gently, holding on tightly. She felt tears stain her own eyes as she looked over at Ryan, Esposito, and Jenny. They all were standing now with sad expressions on their faces. They'd never seen Kate like this. Esposito and Ryan exchanged glances deciding they couldn't stand it any longer. They walked up to Lanie and tapped her on the shoulder. Lanie pulled gently away from Kate.

Kate looked up to see why she pulled away to find the boys standing in front of her with sorrowful expressions on their faces. Before Kate could say anything, they pulled her into a tight group hug where she felt herself begin to cry again.

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><p><strong>Okay guys, what did you think? Like it? Love it?<br>****I know Jim probably wouldn't be able to talk that well after a heart attack and he was dying but for the sake of the story, he was. I tried to do research and kept finding multiple answers. (: Please review!  
><strong>**OH, I almost forgot! Advertising time! :D A few more of the stories I have out! I'd love for you to check them out if you get the time! **

_**Always-**_Castle and Beckett have been dating for over a year; Castle is ready to tie the knot, but before he can even ask her, he needs to talk to Jim Beckett. With or without Jim's consent will he be able to fight his nerves and ask Beckett to marry him?

_**Forever & Always**_-"If it's all I ever do; I'll never stop loving you." The now married Castle and Beckett work the case of a missing five year old boy, along with dealing with the obstacles of being newlyweds. Sequel to 'Always'...but can also work as a stand-alone

_**Unspoken Words**_**- **Letters to Johanna. Kate writes letters to her Mom. She tells her all of the things she can't say out loud. She writes of life, cases, and Castle.


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